???
its hard feeling alone again. Feeling like boredom will become your destroyed, loneliness will take you to pieces and you'll never recover. I haven't been alone for a very long time and I think I've lost all my methods of coping with it. Any suggestions? please?
I wonder how many people read this. Its two in the morning, very warm outside, and I feel pretty good being awake for some reason. Maybe it's the weather change. In the day today I think I'm going to study Nihongo with holtgraver-san if she comes in contact with me to make arrangements and the like.
I need to get a plan for what job to have while I write, and what job to have for saving up to leave and stuff. I don't know what I can do, or where to start looking.
I feel very tired of being around myself, I don't know if that's weird or anything, but I feel gross. like "why would anyone want to touch me" kinda gross. But that's probably fallout from the loneliness. Bah.
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I do know what it is like to be alone, Alot, i did it through high school, Sitting rotting away in my parents basement, I dont really know a way to escape it, I had that someone catch my eye and i went for it, so honestly just go for it, it traveled to a different state to do what i wanted. Go for it dude, you can always come back fuck you can live with me if you ever need a place to stay I will always be there for you yeah sometimes i say ill be right back and i don't come back i suck at attention, but i love you like a brother i would give my shirt off my back. Whatever you feel like you need to do, do it, it sucks to wonder why and be stuck with a routine that eats your fucking brain, I know how you feel.
ReplyDeleteTomorrow i have class 1-2, once your done with school, give me a call we will meet downtown and go to my place, and relax and play some halo and stuff dude, just talk, Allie has work till late, and i dont have work tomorrow, Take some shit off your mind.
I will talk to you tomorrow my brother.
Villhaum